I once had a man tell me that Giselle herself could not make these pants look good. He was referring, of course, to Victoria’s Secret model Gisele Bundchen, a genetic anomaly of physical perfection I would prefer to never be compared to ever again in my life. Like most of the world I love Gisele, and like most women exposed to commercial beauty norms from birth, I do not always love myself. The pants, not surprisingly, landed in my Goodwill donation bag where they have been sitting for months.
On Saturday I resurrected them from their plastic tomb for the Charlotte Shopping Tour because… to hell with this nonsense.
The Charlotte Shopping Tour (produced by my wonderfully talented friend Jen) involves getting loaded onto a bus, hopped up on champagne and carted around to various boutiques throughout the city. Who would not do this?
The boutiques offer special discounts, cookies and… more champagne.
While the ladies get drunk and gleefully spend their cash money.
I was still nursing the financial wound that was Vegas this month so I managed to control myself. I did however get the most incredible Banana Republic trench cape at an upscale consignment shop for $10. TEN DOLLARS. It will likely appear here as a Wear It feature next week.
Oh also I’m keeping the damn pants.